"I don't care if this is your side of the mountain. You can't live in a tree, kid."
"I'm from child protective services. We heard there were children living in a boxcar."
"Fudge almost ate Peter's turtle, but I stopped him because I am capable of providing proper parental supervision."
"I'm Count Olaf. I want the children's inheritance." "I'm their attorney, the executor of the parental estate, and court-appointed guardian. See you in court."
"What'd you do today, Hardy Boys?" "We went to school."
"Pevensie children, please stand back from the platform when the train is approaching."